Uncovering a Mask: Finishing the year in my Purpose



I felt as if I was spinning my wheels. 
At the beginning of this year, my goal was to understand and operate within my purpose.  I knew that it would require a great deal of faith, scary faith.  But it really didn’t matter because I was at the end of myself, tired of doing the same thing with limited results.  I had to release control and give it over to my creator who knew what he had purposed for me. I am reminded of that in one of my favorite bible verse:

Jeremiah 29:11 (KJV) – For I know the thoughts I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. God had something he wanted me to do. 

The fear of stepping in the unknown was far less than the fear of not pleasing God or fulfilling my purpose.  I just couldn’t be satisfied as I was. I knew that I couldn’t go on the way I have been.  Sure, I accomplished a lot of the thing things I set out to do, but God had another plan.  I have to move forward in him with faith.  For without faith it is impossible to please him. So, I made a goal and theme that 2017 is the year that I am “Moving in Faith towards my Purpose.” So I put my head down and grinded like I never had.  I spent many a night awake working long hours trying to make things happen. The problem was that I still missed the true purpose that God had placed on my heart as a child.  I was too focused on what I thought was taking care of everyone else to the sacrifice of myself and ultimately my purpose. I sometimes felt that I was spinning my wheels. So I cried out to God and asked him to help me figure things out, I was so unsettled that though I enjoyed what I was doing, it didn’t fill a huge hole inside of me. Again, I am at a crossroads.

Then one day listening to Richard Smallwood play “It is well with my soul” I knew what I was missing.  I realized what I should be doing and have avoided practically all of my life due to fear. I should be teaching God’s word to His people. That is where I am at home; what I can literally do for hours without exhaustion.  He is so amazing and there are so many layers of learning that I could study for a hundred years and still not uncover everything.  I love sharing what I’ve learned.  I love hearing his voice teach me and explain to me what something really meant or why something happened and connect with his word – word that I had forgotten about or ever studied before! God is so amazing! Teaching His word, not even teaching but sharing his word is what He put in my spirit long ago as a child. I avoided it in my youth and through the years because I was taught that women couldn’t preach. I was shattered. Now it appears that my life has gone full circle in going back to what God had originally put on my heart:   

Proverbs 19:21 (KJV) There are many devices in a man’s heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, that shall stand. 

As I rediscovered my true purpose, God also revealed to me meanings of scripture that I hadn't quite understood until last year.  It's amazing, because it was what I truly knew in my spirit and I share in my blog Discovering Truth.   
(If you are overly sensitive or not open to understanding scripture differently than you've been taught then this blog is NOT for you).  

What is keeping you from your purpose? 

Get your 2017 gear before it's gone!  



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